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July 19, 2019, 06:30:42 pm

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Author Topic: Monster Cereal Smackdown  (Read 1001 times)

Offline Lex Quintus

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Monster Cereal Smackdown
« on: October 17, 2012, 09:12:29 am »
While I still believe Count Chocula to be the hands-down favorite, there is this potential counterargument:

Quote
In February 1972, Franken Berry cereal included dye that turned some children's feces pink due to an inability to break down the heavily dyed breakfast food, a symptom sometimes referred to as "Frankenberry Stool."

Boo Berry was always my second choice, Franken Berry third.  I have only dim memories of Fruit Brute commercials, none of eating it, and no memory at all of Yummy Mummy.

What would GOONs create, in the way of monster cereals...?

DoorNail in the Coffin: Drowns itself unbidden in your milk, then mysteriously berates you for wasting the milk.  Emptying the bowl is easy but the crumbs stick around forever.


Schattenman for Brains:
Dimly evokes Bela Lugosi to the point where nothing you read/hear him say sounds like anything other than a bad imitation.  Which even still is more entertaining than actual content (if any) therein.


Buried in a Kaskus:
Joins up with other cereals to fill your bowl.  Still not worth a second helping.

What else, GOONs?
Hey, how come only some of my wars let me do two up NS charts?  I have one expired war I can do that with (and two no), but when I chart the guy I'm fighting I only see his NS?

It's because your cock is so much bigger than his, the game can't put them on the same scale.

Offline dbcooper

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Re: Monster Cereal Smackdown
« Reply #1 on: October 17, 2012, 09:47:39 am »
Rukunu's Reproachful Raspberry: Bits of surprisingly tart, bitter, dried raspberries populate this otherwise bland, tired cereal.  The box contains drawings of the cartoonish lovable Rukunu mascot, insulting the consumer.  Most of the insults call into question your authenticity, saying if you really wanted to purchase and eat cereal, you should have done so a few years ago.

Edit: Editing
« Last Edit: October 17, 2012, 09:50:21 am by dbcooper »




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